I am really beginning to dislike car seats. We transferred Cheech from an infant car seat to a Britax Marathon when she was about 3 months old. Although she was definitely happier in her "big kid" seat, she never really got too comfortable, considering I still sit in the backseat with her if both Joe and I are in the car. For a few months there, it was looking like she might actually, eventually, be totally content in her car seat. But I kid you not, the very day she became mobile, that dream was shattered. Basically, she can't stand to be strapped into anything. If we avoid the shoulder straps in her stroller, she's pretty cool, but there's no way we can/would want to do that in her car seat.

I have a feeling that there are two things we might be able to do to hopefully help with our arduous car rides. Currently, her seat is strapped onto the middle seat and in a reclining position. I was under the impression that the seat HAD to be in the middle, but with all the seats I see placed on the side, maybe I was misled? I'm assuming that putting her on the side will give her the option of looking out the window, which might actually keep her distracted from those pesky straps. Is this wishful thinking, or am I, perhaps, on to something here?

I also have a feeling that putting her seat in a more upright position might make for a more enjoyable ride. She's been sitting up for months, now, and lounging isn't something she's exactly fond of. My only concern with this option is how it will affect her naps in the car. I do try to avoid car ride naps as much as possible because I've noticed that she naps better and longer at home. I think the longest she's ever napped in our car has been about 40 minutes (for her, that's a very short nap). BUT, with the way life works, sometimes she just has to spend one of her naps on the road.

So, were going to try both of these techniques out this week and I'll report back. I can't be the only one with a baby who starts screaming the second she sees her car seat, right?

Noll Noll Handmade

It is with the greatest pleasure that I introduce Hank + Lucy's very first sponsor to you, Frazier + Wing. If you guys have been reading this blog since the beginning, you may recall that I had my heart set on a Frazier + Wing mobile for our nursery/baby nook in our bedroom, and that I was lucky enough to be gifted one from a friend. I often imagine how I will decorate Cheech's room once she finally has one of her own, and one of the first things I think of is where I'll put he mobile... over her bed, over her dresser, near a window, it would really look fantastic anywhere. I love it, but even more importantly, Cheech loves it. It's hard to know exactly how receptive your child will be towards their mobile, you know?

I think what is most special about her mobile, to me, is that it's not necessarily a "baby" mobile, so she can use it for years to come, and even take it with her on the day she moves out. It's so beautiful, that it would really work well in any room. I've actually got my eye set on one of the branch mobiles, or garlands (or both) for myself. Oh, and Heather, the one-lady show behind Frazier + Wing, is too sweet for words. We exchanged a few emails back when I was posting about mobiles, and I was a little blown away by her kindness.

Seriously guys, the mobiles on her website are gorgeous, but the photos can't show exactly how stunning they are in person. So if you're in the market for one show-stopping mobile, I highly suggest one of the many Frazier + Wing has to offer. AND, if you happen to be expecting a baby, you can always register for it with Amazon's Universal Registry. That's what I did. :)

Remember back in the day, when I was looking for the perfect mobile? I got the one I wanted and Cheech LOVES it. A friend bought us another felted elephant mobile that I hung over our bed because it works as a nice distraction every night while I'm changing her into her pajamas... for some reason, this is a ritual she is not fond of. Well, now I'm in the market for a third mobile. Cheech has this horrible habit of trying to roll onto her belly while I'm changing her diaper, and no matter how many times I tell her, she can't seem to remember how incredibly counterproductive that is. I'm hoping hanging a mobile above her changing table will give her a reason to want to stay on her back, even if it's just for a minute. I think this one's calling my name.

Remember back when Jamie was talking about childproofing? I have to admit, at the time, childproofing seemed SO far into the future that I didn't really even give it a second thought. Well, things have changed. Right at six months, Cheech started to sit up on her own. I kid you not, just about a week later, she started doing that thing where she gets on all fours and rocks back and forth. From what I've heard, that means crawling is right around the corner. It's obvious that she's desperate to crawl. Although she's not exactly doing the hand/knee, hand/knee movement just yet, she is definitely mobile. If she sees something she wants a few feet away, whether by rolling or by nudging her little body, she'll make sure she gets to it.

As soon as I noticed this new development, I started to see our apartment in a somewhat different light. I began to worry about our low-to-the-ground cabinet full of glass barware and our bookshelves with stacks of very heavy books. And now when I look at our marble coffee table, I shudder. Just yesterday, she was sitting on the couch with me when she flopped over and landed on her pinky in a back bent position. The wailing that ensued was intense, but luckily after some hugs and a game of peek-a-boo, I was able to calm her down. It made me realize that if she can hurt herself so easily just by SITTING, then the damage that can be done once she's really moving is freakish. After all, I do have the baby that fell off the FOOT of the bed.

I totally get what Jamie was trying to say in that post. I don't want to spend every minute of every day saying "no" and keeping a hawk eye on Cheech, but at the same time, I just don't see how you can reason with a six-month old. So now it's inevitable, I guess. Project baby-proofing will start this week.

Photo, YrVelouria

via

Ben and I never talked about having kids.

We talked about having a kid.

I mean, they are so expensive. If we had one, maybe we could actually send him/her to college, and pay for it? And with one, we figured, you are a little more mobile. You know? I have two siblings, but we are so far apart (and with different fathers) that I grew up more or less as an only child. And I don't feel ripped off in the least.

But then in the last few years, I started kind of looking over the fence. We would, for example, be watching United States of Tara, and seeing how (even though they weren’t BFFs) the kids related, how they could turn to each other during their parents' insanity, it would kind of touch me. (It didn't have the same effect on Ben.)

Then Henry was born. I remember thinking, a day or two later, "I don't know if I can do that again." I also remember thinking a month or so later "I can't imagine doing this with a toddler here." Or, "I can't imagine going through the absolute all encompassing exhaustion I felt during the first trimester of pregnancy with a TODDLER."

And yet, as I knew I probably would, we seem to forget. And also, I know that women and families do it ALL THE TIME. And everything is fine. Great even.

I still don't know that I want another baby. (Add to my list of cons; if going back to work with one baby at home breaks my heart, how will I feel when it is TWO?) My feet are still on the one-only side, but I am on my tippy toes peeking over. Ben still has his feet rooted deep into the ground. (I am ignoring that at the moment.) (As he will likely ignore this post.) Not that we need to decide right now, of course. But I can't help but think about it.

Like today, when a friend relayed the sound of a beating heart as heard through the Doppler. (Womp womp, womp womp...) And I am missing in advanced things that haven’t even passed yet, like nursing Henry. Today, when I feel quite certain that I just want another one because tiny babies are so sweet, and surely, there must be another? (And what if Henry never has a child? I understand so much more now the pressure for grandkids.)

Or like when our friend Carly was over a couple of months ago. I was lamenting that Henry had outgrown one of the first outfits that fit him, and I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with it. She suggested she could give it to her friend who was about to have a baby.

"NO!" I practically shrieked as I clutched the tiny garment in my white knuckles.

So that is kind of a problem. We already have all the STUFF. We may as well have another baby to use it, RIGHT? And until I know for sure, what do I do with it? Give it away? Sell it on craigslist (we could use the cash, for sure. I haven’t had a paycheck in months!)? Or (to Ben's dismay) (and to the downfall of our closets) (and to the joy of our mother in law) store it all.

Just. In. Case.

During Jamie & Celia's maternity leave we asked a few of our favorite moms from around the internet if they would help fill the space with their wisdom. We asked for their thoughts on being a new mom, motherhood in general, or maybe something that really suprised them (no one told me that!). Please welcome Kristina!

Hello Hank & Lucy readers! This is so exciting because me guest-posting means that Hank & Lucy are here! Or nearly here. Hugest congrats to mamas Jamie and Celia!

I've been thinking about what sort of advice I could possibly give to new moms out there that they haven't already heard 1M times. You know, nap when the baby is napping (true!), rest, don't try to do too much, accept help when offered, live in the moment because moments turn into days and months so quickly, try to make a tiny bit of time for yourself once in a while, etc etc etc. All of which are totally 100% time tested and true.

But most of us don't end up following that advice to the letter. Because there are always dishes to do, showers to be had, beds to be made, and sometimes you just wish your baby was a little bit older so he could do this or that or sleep longer or sit up or be mobile. It's just the nature of your first experience as a mother, I suppose. So maybe I won't give you any advice, instead maybe I will just share a part of my experience. The most remarkable part, for me.

What is impossible to prepare for, utterly enveloping, and completely unavoidable is the love. The extraordinarily deep, scary intense, gut-wrenching, rip-your-heart-out-and-wear-it-pinned-to-your-chest love, that appears without warning in the days and months that follow the birth of your child. In fact love actually seems like too small of a word. Too worn and used in so many other ways. This is something different and real and visceral. Something that feels so big and so true, it's hard to describe.

I was sorely unprepared for how the birth of my son would change me. It's as if the axis of my little universe suddenly and irreversibly shifted. I've read many times that having a child feels like watching your heart walk around outside your body. THAT is the truth. And it can be terrifying. I go down dark scary holes thinking about all the "what-ifs" for my little heart, and I wish I didn't but I don't understand how one avoids that? Your most vital organ is now out in the world, swinging on swings, climbing stairs, scraping his knees, eventually growing into a teenager (!), completely unprotected by your body. It's a wonder mothers survive the emotional upheaval.

Do you know what scares me more? Having another. Really. I don't think I'm ready to handle having my mind blown all over again. Jora left me a comment the other day that said "… you are about to find out that a mother's love is exponential." Exponential! That means that if you have three kids you don't have three times as much love. You have love to the power of three. Which is like, whoa. But it is wonderful to feel this deeply.

I can't even fathom what more of this would be like. But I can't wait to find out. You know what motherhood is? It's a drug.

Photograph by Deb Schwedhelm

{my two little guys, they get along great right now, anyways)

Today is two things: 1) My last day at work. 2) If you want to get technical, my "due date". (Honestly I wish the maternity care world would do away with that term all together. But since they have not, I can't help but acknowledge it.) I still think we have a week left, easy. The little guy is still floating happily above my pelvis. As I mentioned, I put away my to do list a couple of weeks ago. But in order to keep away boredom and anxiety of when is he coming I do have a list of want to do stuff. I might do all of it, or none of it. (Okay, the walking and stretching is pretty mandatory, and the reading is a given.) But when I do *nothing* I tend to get in a funk. No one wants that. So here is how I might be spending the next week or two.

*Buy a plant for the baby's room

*Shop for dog beds

*Read the Sunday Times

*Enjoy the warm, sunny weekend

*Make a mobile

*Hang out with Ben

*photograph the baby's room for the blog

*play some ping pong

*go to the used gear sale

*Edit my brothers wedding photos

*Work on a baby announcement

*Walk, walk, walk

*Stretch, stretch, stretch

*Visit with friends

*Continue to organize our photo collection

*Read

*Try to sew something

(and lots of rest, OF COURSE)

mobile // book // swimmies // romper // snail music box // hat

{if i were on a shopping spree today}

My belly seems to have officially met its limit. We scheduled our cesarian birth (thank you, Rachel) this week. It's pretty wild to pick out your child's birthday. They only give you an option of two days, but still, it's very surreal to know that you'll be giving birth by a specific date. I caught Joe standing over the crib the other day and just staring at it. I knew exactly what he was thinking; in just about a week this baby will be out of my belly and in that very crib. I'm not going to say we're ready, because I don't think anyone is ever ready for such a life changing experience. But, we're set... everything is in its place and ready to go. So now, we wait.

*Look! One of my dearest friends ended up getting us THE MOBILE, and Heather even did a little post about it on the Frazier + Wing blog.

** Since I'm giving props, I made those fabric panels using fabrics from Wonder Fluff, and yes, those are Sharon Montrose Baby Giraffes given to us by our friends, Kelly and Peter.

I am currently going through a bit of a mobile crisis. I've been searching for the perfect one for months now and it seems that they are either beautiful but just not the right fit for the look I'm going for, or they're downright horrid. Seriously people, there's some ugly baby crap out there. Obviously, most of us have seen these Frazier & Wing mobiles floating around blogland... they're fantastic (especially the yellow one)! So, why not buy one? Well, with all the other expenses we have right now (birthing classes, MEDICAL BILLS) plus the fact that I'll be taking about three months off of work, I'm just not sure it makes sense for us to spend $75 on a mobile. Not that I don't think they're worth it, because I DO. And then, I'm not sure I feel comfortable putting a $75 mobile on our registry. Although I did manage to add this $48 GIRAFFE so my logic must be totally out of whack. Anyway, I guess what I'm trying to say is, is it absolutely ludicrous to spend $75 on a mobile when I'm not a guh-zillionaire? It's not like we're racking up credit card debt for this baby, but still? And I have spent that amount (and more) on an article of clothing and not thought twice about it. Am I over thinking this, like I do with pretty much everything in my life? Should I just stop being such a baby and make my own mobile... even though the thought of taking on a mobile project makes my pregnancy hormones soar through the roof, and even though I know in my heart it would never be as beautiful as the yellow one I really want?? What would you do?